Professor Brink

For the past four to five weeks, I have been taking Finite Math (also dubbed Math 141 at A&M) taught by a wonderful teacher named Professor Brink. This man is the quintessence of the word "unique". Ask anyone who has had a class with him - Brett Jacobsen, Laura Schroeder, or Morgan Nix - and they will all tell you that they have never met another man like Professor Brink. Why is he so unique you say?

Besides the fact that he has 3-inch think glasses, he looks behind you as he is talking to you, and sometimes gets lost in his own math problems...he has the strangest analogies. For serious.

In fact, they were so strange that I actually wrote down his quotes during class in hopes of looking back on them one day. Therefore, I now dedicate this post to Professor Brink, to look back on the man with a million off-the-wall analogies about anything off-the-wall. Hopefully you can be just as much entertained as I was...and still am.

Professor Brink Quotes

"Math is a lot like picnic games...or hardcore parties."

"You know, math's challenging attributes are a lot like shooting an elephant with one bullet...do you know how to Travis? You have to be precise and accurate. You have to shoot him right through the eye. (dramatic pause). Have a steady hand and it can be possible."

"How many of yall consider yourself animal lovers?"

"Statistics is a lot like vehicles. You can take a bike, roller stakes, a dirt bike, car, etc...or you can just take a yellow lamborghini and get the heck out of there!"

"And when mother superior tells you to go in the corner and stand on your head, you dog-gone do it! And that's the end of it."

"If you learn how to use the calculator, you have just about everything but the kitchen sink."

"Folks, in today's world, saying you don't need annuity formulas is a lot like saying a tribesman in a jungle doesn't need to hunt bananas."

"Hmmm, yeah, they slow boat to China on some of these problems don't they."

"Math is a lot like sauerkraut."

"You know folks, Finite Math is kind of like going to a high-life party. You have all the great food, drinks, and scenery you want a party, but then the host wants you to play some weird and peculiar game. Then, the only thing you want to do is run and hide by the dog-gone pool!"

"How many of yall consider yourselves professional and highly technological video gamers?"

"Union means that...you know, you're relatives from Utah come in for your wedding and you have to give them something to eat."

"You know folks, I run my classroom and exams like the minor canaries in Hong-Kong...or Tokyo or whatever you want. Whenever the air gets too polluted, the canaries begin to heel over and die. That's a little bit like my top students."

"So, to use one of my analogies, it's kind of like driving to Maui in a stretch limo. The only problem you will have is learning how to drive the stupid thing."